These are some of the pictures of my school. Keep telling about my school,I forgot to put the pictures here. Thanks to my "adik" in SABDA for providing this picture. =D
Where did I stop? Oh yeah! Okay,let's continue.
Honestly, it was a very pathetic Saturday I ever had in my whole life. Eventhough I laid my eyes on the television but my mind wasn't there. I kept thinking about my decision. Am I on the track? Depressed conquered my mind and I can't seem to see ways to get rid of it. At last,I continued mourning. Crying until I have no more tears to shed. Just imagine how fragile my feeling was. Before this , I tend to think that I am a strong girl. But deep inside my heart,I am just like any other girl who needs support from the loved ones. So, I took steps to the public phone-my favourite spot .
I called Mum,again, to lighten the stress. I tried to control my voice when I heard Mum talking. So I let Mum said everything she needs to say as I can't utter any words. I just want to hear Mum's voice,that's all. Every single thing that I need to hear,non-stop advices and moral support just to make sure her beloved daughter feel calm. Too bad,those words aren't good enough to fill my spirit. When I was about to end my conversation with Mum, I heard Mum said, they are going to visit me on the next day. Oh Allah! Only Allah knows how glad I was. I just can't wait to see the sun rise tomorrow.
After that,I looked for Farah and told her the great news for me. And she told the same thing to me. Our parents will come ; the joy that we've been looking for. As the next day began, I called Mum asking when they will arrive. Again,tears became a disease for me. My eyes were just like forbidden to stop crying when I saw my family. Blah blah blah. After spending a few hours with them,it's time to say farewell. Goodbye,loves! They left me alone, surviving with the environment that I hate. At night on the same day,prep class. With unwilling heart,I stepped in the class and did things I must finished. Around 11.30 o'clock, slumber time for me. I need to rest my eyes. They have been working too efficient today =) .
Monday arrived ; the beginning of my first week. As early as 5 a.m, my alarm clock started to shout loudly. I quickly get up and took shower as I hate to wait for lines. After performed Subuh prayer, Farah,Khadijah and I went to dining hall to take our breakfast. Blah blah blah. *skip skip skip*. Classroom time. I felt totally left out alone. At first, I was asked to sit beside an unknown girl who was in the same shoe as me, a new student. We both share our thoughts, the sadness. That was not enough for me to forget my mourning. Luckily,Khadijah asked to change place with some of them so both of us managed to sit beside each other. Alhamdulillah. Finally, I have a person whom I know I can rely on. Almost everyday for that one week,we talked about Andalas. Our mind can't just stop thinking about Andalas. About teachers to the students.
When Khadijah was about to build the strength in herself, I came and destroyed the strength. How bad I was! Sorry Khadijah, I didn't mean it but I just need someone to share this feeling. Sorry because I didn't notice it before! Because of an incident, I started to talk with the classmates. The first person I became close in that class(besides Khadijah) was the person who sits in front of me. As time goes by, I became close with him and he was the place I expressed my feeling. He was one of the best listeners in this world. He was also the person who responsible to enhance my spirits when I fall apart. As the first intake students,he told me everything to make me feel the calmness staying there. Sharing all the experiences he went through about a month living in that school before I came, I realize ; I can survive!
*to be continue.....
No comments:
Post a Comment