Saturday, June 12, 2010

Back Off

Where should I start? Everything is messed up. Trying to hide behind the wall of concrete truth,that is what I am currently doing. For more than two months I neglected the heart's call as I was busy mending the pieces of broken fragile soul,finally I managed to build the strength to wake up from this bad dream. Still remember when you came and asked me to spill out everything to you? "Its not good to keep your problems alone",the phrase that belonged to you. But it seems I took the wrong steps.

Sometimes I do think how I could trust you to hold such secret? You know the whole story,dear friend. Story from both sides. You know everything I feel inside outside. You know what I expected from you. Do you still remember when I used to tell you the incident that happened in the drama almost every night? It's because I trust you. I believe you are a friend. But you turned everything upside down. Sometimes I do think you are doing it on purpose,to be honest. Or should I remind you,that you owned the "special" one to think about?

Sometimes I do have the regrets for telling you the thing you shouldn't know. You destroy the trust discreetly in your own way. A great compliment with big applause should be given to you. That's very versatile,dear until I can't even read it from your eyes. Hurting me from the way you act,congratulation superb actress! You wrenched things that used to be beside me though you know how I could get hurt. Two thumbs up for your acting,professional actress.

Please, I can't go any further with this. Please put off those masks and show the world the reality that lies beneath it. Why should you turned things worst? If only I could say right in front of you, "You dont deserved to be trusted". Dear friend,if by watching me endure the pain and heal the wound specially created by you could bring the shine of happiness in your life, million of thanks to you. Regardless of what happened,you are still a friend but the scar made by you will always remain deep inside this heart.

This is what I wrote on my table ; just in case my tears would come out.

The girl who seemed unbreakable- broke.
I finally give up and back off from this game.
Congratulation for both of the fantastic casts.
You are no longer a part of me.
Thank you for showing me the path to get myself out from this drama.
This is the end.


  1. i would suggest a punch or two to whom this post was targetted to.
    but that would threaten the term 'gadis melayu sangat sopan santun'.
    so, forgive and forget. and get wiser and wiser.
    that's how people grow:)

    *a bitch-slap would be SUPER-FUN instead tho.just a suggestion.mind:)

  2. haha..thank you for your concern.
    shah,your suggestion sounds good.
    i wish i could proceed with it.
    but nvermind,as you said,get wiser and wiser.

    maybe she just dont deserved to be in my diary. deserved to be in my burn book,perhaps?
    hahahahaha. *evil laugh


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