"Every cloud has a silver lining". So,words never lie,huh? What's that supposed to mean? A muslim's obligation, 5.30 a.m today, I woke up and had my sahur together with mum and dad. After performed my Subuh prayer, I was planning to continue my homework after that since I accidently fall asleep last night. Unfortunately, luck was not on my side. When I was about to open my book and took a pen from my pencil case, electric supply was out of service! Damn it! It's only me left in the house while dad sent mum to her office. Raining heavily outside, oh, absolutely the sun will not show itself this morning. Where should I get source of light? Candles were nowhere to be found.
Torchlight? I've no idea where dad put that thing. Come on! Don't tell me this is how my day would began for today. I glanced at the clock, 7 o'clock? Oh dear! What am I supposed to do in this house alone by myself? The darkness that surrounded me gave me a creepy look. At last, I think I better get some sleep. 'Perhaps the people are doing their job' my mind said. But still, after a few hours waiting with hopes, there's no sign my wish would come true. Can I watch tv please? Arghh! So, the best way to get out myself out of this boredness, I took my mp3. Oh,it can't be happening! The mp3 was running out of battery,need to be charged. Fine,handphone is there, isn't it? Ah,not again! Battery low? Aish..it switched off automatically before I had a chance to text mum, telling my condition. There you go.
I was like a mad person, searching for anything I could do to kill the time. Finally, 2.15 p.m, I heard sounds of tv from my room. Yippie! My patience is not a waste! Lalala... Berbuka time! Right before azan Maghrib, my phone rang which means a text message received. From hotlink '...successfully topup with RM10'. I asked both my parents,sis and bro. No one admit. Haha! Another lucky day. Well, I bet they must have put the wrong number and accidently the money goes into my account. Say I'm mumbling? I don't care. I'm too happy to get furious with unnecessary things. Whoever you are "Mr, Mrs or Ms. Generous, I just want to thank you for making my day. Yeah, silver lining deserves it's name!
These are some of the pictures of my school. Keep telling about my school,I forgot to put the pictures here. Thanks to my "adik" in SABDA for providing this picture. =D
Where did I stop? Oh yeah! Okay,let's continue.
Honestly, it was a very pathetic Saturday I ever had in my whole life. Eventhough I laid my eyes on the television but my mind wasn't there. I kept thinking about my decision. Am I on the track? Depressed conquered my mind and I can't seem to see ways to get rid of it. At last,I continued mourning. Crying until I have no more tears to shed. Just imagine how fragile my feeling was. Before this , I tend to think that I am a strong girl. But deep inside my heart,I am just like any other girl who needs support from the loved ones. So, I took steps to the public phone-my favourite spot .
I called Mum,again, to lighten the stress. I tried to control my voice when I heard Mum talking. So I let Mum said everything she needs to say as I can't utter any words. I just want to hear Mum's voice,that's all. Every single thing that I need to hear,non-stop advices and moral support just to make sure her beloved daughter feel calm. Too bad,those words aren't good enough to fill my spirit. When I was about to end my conversation with Mum, I heard Mum said, they are going to visit me on the next day. Oh Allah! Only Allah knows how glad I was. I just can't wait to see the sun rise tomorrow.
After that,I looked for Farah and told her the great news for me. And she told the same thing to me. Our parents will come ; the joy that we've been looking for. As the next day began, I called Mum asking when they will arrive. Again,tears became a disease for me. My eyes were just like forbidden to stop crying when I saw my family. Blah blah blah. After spending a few hours with them,it's time to say farewell. Goodbye,loves! They left me alone, surviving with the environment that I hate. At night on the same day,prep class. With unwilling heart,I stepped in the class and did things I must finished. Around 11.30 o'clock, slumber time for me. I need to rest my eyes. They have been working too efficient today =) .
Monday arrived ; the beginning of my first week. As early as 5 a.m, my alarm clock started to shout loudly. I quickly get up and took shower as I hate to wait for lines. After performed Subuh prayer, Farah,Khadijah and I went to dining hall to take our breakfast. Blah blah blah. *skip skip skip*. Classroom time. I felt totally left out alone. At first, I was asked to sit beside an unknown girl who was in the same shoe as me, a new student. We both share our thoughts, the sadness. That was not enough for me to forget my mourning. Luckily,Khadijah asked to change place with some of them so both of us managed to sit beside each other. Alhamdulillah. Finally, I have a person whom I know I can rely on. Almost everyday for that one week,we talked about Andalas. Our mind can't just stop thinking about Andalas. About teachers to the students.
When Khadijah was about to build the strength in herself, I came and destroyed the strength. How bad I was! Sorry Khadijah, I didn't mean it but I just need someone to share this feeling. Sorry because I didn't notice it before! Because of an incident, I started to talk with the classmates. The first person I became close in that class(besides Khadijah) was the person who sits in front of me. As time goes by, I became close with him and he was the place I expressed my feeling. He was one of the best listeners in this world. He was also the person who responsible to enhance my spirits when I fall apart. As the first intake students,he told me everything to make me feel the calmness staying there. Sharing all the experiences he went through about a month living in that school before I came, I realize ; I can survive!
*to be continue.....
Well,since one my friends asked me to share my experiences leading a life as a hostel's student. Here you are,dear! This is the only thing I can share with you. Nothing much actually. Most of them knew my stories,arent they? But please take note- I'm not good at memorizing things so there might be some stories left behind. No offense. Let's begin with the first day I stepped in the school.
The first day, I saw the school. And everything seems to suit what I've always imagined before. No big surprise. So just like any other students, I went through all the registration(*pls correct me if i'm wrong!) process and that's it! Officially I am the SABDA's students. Blah blah blah. Before we went to the surau to perform the maghrib prayer,we went to the dining hall to eat our dinner? Who are we? Its me,Farah and Khadijah. Suddenly,I saw a face. Seems familiar and unexpectedly,a sudden action from that boy,shouting my name at the middle of the dining hall,asking "Bila kau sampai?". So I showed him the sign "LATER" which means I'll talk to him later. That lucky guy? Of course it is Haziq Ishak. The time for prep session has arrived. Night's prep. As a clueless girl who knew nothing about the schedule in that school,I just followed every single thing stated exactly punctual on the time in which I need not. I mean like, I am supposed to have some spare time to relax myself. During the prep time,Khadijah introduced me to all my classmates but I couldn't see any chance I would be happy staying in that class.
Being too nerdy,I make myself punctual for every activities. Gosh! At that moment,I swear I regretted my decision for transferring to the school. Totally damn exhausted was the main solid reason I make myself felt empty there. Situation with my current classmates,arghh!! Why all of them seems to ignore my presence? I was like a statue at the back of the class as nobody notice my presence. I hate that!! All of the NANIRO's and 4 St/1 faces came to appear in my views. I just can't get focus with my lesson. Who cares about that? My heart is not at peace ; my soul doesn't belong there. How am I supposed to study? In fact,the mental torture continuously with the teacher's learning method that I can't adapt. I almost,nearly gave up with myself though I've tried to sooth myself,to be stronger as this is what they called challenges. But still,I miss Andalas so bad until I can't resist those tears. Tears became my best partner for the one whole week.
The surrounding gave me an unpleasant feeling that I hate and I'm certain I need to get rid of it as soon as possible. The way? Yes,absolutely. I need to transfer back to my previous school. I have almost everything there. Its like I couldn't ask for anything better. That's my main goal for that particular moment. So,during the "riadah" time on the next day after I registered,I called my parents, making them even more worried about my conditions. I picked up the phone,called them just to ask how they are doing in which actually I can't stop to think about them since they left me yesterday. I reminded myself not to cry when talking to them on the phone because I refused to hear they get worried over me. Yet, I lost to myself. When I hear their voices on the phone,those tears came out without permission.
I went through my first weekend at the hostel. Observing how people entertained themselves just to lead a happy life. I must do the same! Wake up at 6 o'clock,perform the Subuh prayer,recite Al-Quran as much as I wish with irresistible tears and around 6.30 I went to dining hall to fill the stomach though my appetite seems to forget its track. Luckily it is Saturday. After having my breakfast, I went back to my dorm just to take a few things and went out again with Farah to Bilik Rekreasi to watch television. I can't stay at the dorm and never for the one whole week. I am absolutely uncomfortable with my dormmates. Just like living with strangers,that's exactly what I felt at that moment. Lying alone on the bed at dorm makes me remind of everything I shouldn't! Oh no!
p/s : to be continue okayh,too sleepy to continue writing. need to sahur!
Tepat jam 12 tengah malam Ahad yang lalu,telefon bimbitku berdering menandakan ada pesanan ringkas buatku. Bunyi yang memenuhi segenap ruang kamar aku biarkan terus beralun. Perasaan malasku mengatasi perasaan ingin tahu yang membuak-buak di kala itu. Namun akhirnya,aku tewas juga lantaran dihambat rasa ingin tahu pemberi pesanan ringkas buatku di waktu begini. 'Mungkin penting' desis hati kecilku. Lalu,dengan langkah yang longlai aku menuju ke meja,mencapai telefon bimbitku yang terletak rapi di sudut meja. Sebuah pesanan yang cukup ringkas buatku. "Happy Birthday" beserta grafik yang menggamit hati dari kakak yang turut berkongsi tarikh lahir yang sama denganku. Hari jadiku,bererti hari jadinya juga. Mata yang separuh sedar itu akhirnya terkebil-kebil menatap pesanan ringkas itu buat kesekian kalinya. Ya Allah, 23 ogos! 'Macam mana boleh terlelap ni?' bentak hati kecilku.
Bibirku mula menguntumkan senyuman saat akal warasku mula menjalankan tugasnya. Lantas laju sahaja jari-jemariku menari di atas papan kekunci telefon bimbitku untuk mengucapkan selamat juga padanya. Tidak lama selepas itu,bertalu-talu pesanan ringkas yang bertandang daripada teman-teman mengucapkan selamat buat diri ini. Ya Tuhan,dari hati yang tulus ikhlas,aku benar-benar terasa syahdu untuk hari lahirku buat kali ini. Hiba menyelubungi kalbu tatkala malam melabuhkan tirai. Mereka masih ingat tarikh penting buat diriku ini,Ya Tuhan! Terharu! Sesungguhnya,itulah perkataan yang tepat bagiku kala itu. Mungkin kerana hari lahirku tahun ini sedikit berbeza berbanding tahun sebelumnya. Ya,hari lahirku disambut dalam bulan yang mulia. Tahun ini juga merupakan penghijrahan terbesar bagi diriku. Sayu,tiada kata yang mampu aku lontarkan namun tiada pula mutiara jernih di kelopak mata ini mahu menitis. Aku biarkan diri terdiam seketika.
Tidak ketinggalan,teman-teman yang baru aku kenali di sekolah baru juga tidak lupa tarikh keramat itu. Bertuahnya aku, dikelilingi insan-insan yang menyayangi diri ini. Malam itu,aku menjadi insan paling lemah. Entah kenapa,hatiku menjadi terlalu rapuh malam itu. Doa yang tidak-tidak putus aku panjatkan kepada Yang Maha Mendengar,kerana dengan izinNya aku masih diberi kesempatan bernafas di atas muka bumi yang indah ini. Aku bersyukur kerana aku masih lagi berpeluang meneruskan ibadah,melaksanakan tanggungjawabku sebagai hambaNya. Paling penting, aku bertuah kerana aku masih sedar siapa aku.
Selamat hari lahir ke-16, Izzatul Nazihah Bt Yahya.
Setelah sebulan meninggalkan blog kesayanganku ini tanpa diberi makan,hari ini aku kembali. Rindunya pada blog ni tak terkata. Dekat sekolah aku,mana boleh nak update blog ni. Maklumlah,duduk dekat kawasan yang terkenal dengan kelapa sawitnya. Tiap-tiap hari jumpa serangga aje lah.
Sama macam budak-budak sekolah asrama lain,sekarang ni aku tengah menikmati hari cuti sambil menyambut Ramadhan. Assignment yang dibekalkan cikgu memang tak terkata banyaknya. Bagi kerja macam orang cuti sebulan. Lalala..apa boleh buat. Dah nasib badan. Rasa rindu betul dengan kemeriahan Andalas.
Sekarang,pekan Bagan Datoh menjadi pekan terdekat aku . Teluk Intan menjadi bandar utama aku. Lagu negeri Perak jadi nyanyian harian aku. Aku menjadi warga kelas 4 Al-Farghani. Satu kelas yang aku dapat tafsirkan sebagai paling "friendly" dalam semua kelas yang ada. Mana taknya,hampir setiap kali waktu prep,mesti kelas aku akan didatangi banyak pelawat dari setiap kelas dan pelawat setia atau "regular customer" kelas aku mestilah Haziq Ishak aka Haziq Supa. Kalau Haziq tak ada je,mesti kelas aku senyap. Hahaha! Sorry Ziq! Oh ye,kelas tu terdiri daripada 12 org lelaki ; 18 org perempuan.
Dekat sekolah tu jugak aku dapat banyak kawan dari seluruh Selangor dan Perak. Kawan dari Perak dengan loghat Peraknya,macam-macam benda yg aku belajar. Bak kata Hakeem,virus rubik tengah merebak sekarang. Sekolah aku pun tak ketinggalan. Tiap-tiap hari pagi petang siang malam budak-budak kat sana main rubik ni non-stop. Siap lawan siapa dapat siapkan paling cepat. Aku pulak tak ketinggalan,tengok orang main,aku pun nak jugak. Tapi sayang,aku belajar separuh jalan. Haha. Penat dah budak-budak kelas aku ajar,tapi aku dapat tangkap separuh je. Last-last aku kena marah. Kui kui kui.
Kekreatifan aku pun mula meluas dekat sini. Benda-benda yang aku tak pernah buat pun aku buat. Contohnya,selama 16 tahun aku hidup,tak pernah-pernah aku main ragbi. Tiba-tiba cikgu suruh main ragbi. Haha,kelakar rasanya. Lepas tu,tak pernah lagi aku sentuh belalang,cengkerik seumur hidup aku. Kat sekolah tu,aku mula bermesra dengan alam semulajadi. Rasa pelik jugak dengan diri sendiri.
Lepas tu,semalam merupakan "cooking lesson" masa kelas english. Seronok. Dapat masak-masak. Macam-macam resipi yang dipersembahkan termasuklah koktel,air bandung. Kumpulan aku masak macaroni goreng menggunakan resepi aku. Yang bestnya,semua orang kena masak macam buat rancangan kat tv tapi dalam english version. Tak pernah-pernah aku masak sambil speaking. Hahaha. Lepas dah siap masak,kena bagi cikgu-cikgu rasa dan jugak budak-budak kelas. Adoi~ penat tapi seronok.
Tapi aku tetap rindu kawan-kawan Andalas aku yang havoc. Cuti ni kita keluar,nak tak? Rindu dowh!
